B.O.C.C.
Match Report
Barnes Occasionals vs. Barnes R.A.F.A.C.C.
9 August 1998 at 2:30 P.M at Barn Elms.
Captain M.C.W.Lichfield (elected to bowl).
B.O.C.C. Won by 4 Wickets
Despite the ferocious heat, and in no small measure reflecting the outcome of the
previous encounter this year between these two Herculean sides, when B.O.C.C. captain
M.C.W. Lichfield won the toss, he elected to bowl first.
The fact that Keith Seed was used as an opening bowler, highlighted the weakness of the
Occasionals side. Much to everybody's surprise, Seed and partner Oliver Hogg gave a good
account of themselves, taking 3 wickets for about 40 runs. First to be replaced was Hogg,
and after a lackluster first over, Pete Tagg who replaced him took a fourth wicket with
the score in the 60's. Shortly after this, Jim Mundy was brought into the attack and had
instant success taking two swift wickets and ending up with figures of 3 for 8, unusually,
none of his victims was below their teens.
All of this took a fair number of field adjustments, and the time these took came in for
vocal on-field criticism by the unequivocal Ian Haddow. Only the threat of fielding at
deep third man for the rest of the innings put the lid on this shamefully dissentfull
outburst.
With the score at 68 for 7, Lichfield decided to cash in, and put himself on to bowl. He
proceeded to bowl an over containing a number of leg side and long hops balls. The last of
these yielded a perfectly catchable sky'er which none of the fielders could get close to,
as they had drifted miles from the allotted positions.
In a moment of insane compassion, Lichfield also put Martin Lawrence on to bowl. His first
over put 5 out of six balls down the leg side at a cost of around eight runs, and although
this was a relatively costly over, it was extremely worthwhile as it yielded an amusing
argument between O.Hogg and Lawrence, the final words of which were "F*** Off
Oliver!". Lichfield's second (and last) over went for eight as well, but he managed
to hit the stumps on the last ball. In the process this put money in Seed's pocket as his
betting book was heavily loaded against such events.
Lawrence then managed a slightly better over, but, by now, things were getting away from
B.O.C.C. and the score had crept to around 95 for 9.
At this point Lichfield was receiving offers (indeed beseechments) to bowl from all
quarters. The reasoning varied from "Well, I gave you a bowl last time I was
captain" to "100 is too much to get on this wicket". Perhaps persuaded by
the last, Lichfield put O. Hogg back into the attack. He was hit for 8 in his over. The
next over went to Seed, who took the 9th wicket with his first ball, closing proceedings
for RAFA who had only been able to field 10 men that day.
RAFA had put on 110 but B.O.C.C had bowled them out in 90 minutes.
Since the Tea had not yet been delivered, it was agreed that the BOCC innings would start
immediately.
Flying in the face of conventional wisdom, Lichfield selected Seed and Lawrence to open
proceedings. This decision was only half right, as Lawrence returned to the pavilion
bowled by Kent after 11 minutes with only 2 runs to his name.
This brought "Mad" Frankie Hanmer to the crease, (not before he managed to
deliver an 'I only bat low down these days' speech, second only in repetitive eloquence to
his regular retirement diatribe). Hanmer lasted for a slightly more respectable 23
minutes, perishing to a simple catch by Siddings, bowled once again by Kent.
Mike Webster then joined Seed in the middle and they proceeded to play a grindingly slow
innings with Webster managing 8 hard earned runs in 47 minutes before he finally was
bowled by Wright.
By now, a leg spinner was operating up the hill, whilst away swinger Parkleton was bowling
down hill. Fancying the chances of the sloggers, Lichfield sent Tagg in to bat and was
instantly rewarded by a 4, followed unfortunately by a single which brought Tagg to sharp
end. Seed then prodded out the next over leaving Tagg to face the quicker bowler. He duly
perished within a few balls bowled by Parkleton.
The run rate was now around 3 an over, so Lichfield turned to middle order specialist Paul
Charman to complete proceedings, unfortunately, Charman returned to the pavilion without
troubling the scorers.
Lichfield knew which of the remaining batsmen could be relied upon to complete
proceedings. So he selected himself and proceeded to make an ungainly 8, playing and
missing the leg spinner and the away swinger so many times that they were both hoarse from
frustrated exclamations by the time he had finally suicidally run himself out.
With around 5 overs to go, and 16 runs to get, Nigel Pettit was brought into the game at
last and was given instructions that two big hits would bring victory to B.O.C.C. In the
event it took three lusty blows from him which yielded 10 runs and a couple of edges from
Seed who ended on 47 Not Out (or 43 if we believe Haddow who was umpire at the time of the
last ball which went for 4 down the leg side).
Seed was elected man of the match by the opposition for his only occasionally entertaining
three hour vigil and two wickets.